Welcome to...  

The Shame-Free Parenting Movement


Ditch the Shame-Based Parenting of the '80s and '90s... for Good

Crystal, The Parenting Coach


Parenting Calm Confident Kids That You Love To Be Around

 

 

 

 

Crystal the parenting coach sitting on a rocky beach

The Parenting Styles We Grew Up With...

1980s and 90s Shame-Based Parenting

  • "Because I said so!"
    Parents as the unquestionable authority.
  • "Why can't you be more like your sister?"
    Constant comparison to others, making you feel "less than."
  • "Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about!"
    Feelings and emotions were ignored or punished.
  • "You should be ashamed of yourself."
    Shame as a primary motivator for good behavior.
  • Silent treatment when disappointed in you.
    Love and attention were conditional on behavior.
  • Threats of spanking or grounding for minor infractions.
    Punishment was often harsh, with no room for discussion.
  • "You’ll never amount to anything if you don’t ____."
    Constant pressure to meet impossibly high expectations.
  • Body shaming and unrealistic standards:
    "Don’t eat so much, it'll show" or “You’d be so much prettier if you took care of yourself.”

A New Era of Parenting:

Shame-Free and Connection-Focused:

  • "Let's talk about this together."
    Collaborative problem-solving, where kids' voices are seen and heard (listening). 

  • "I love you for who you are, not your grades."
    Unconditional love and acceptance, free from comparison.

  • "I can see you're sad, that's hard. I feel sad too sometimes"
    Emotions are validated, and met with empathy (I have felt that too). 

  • "It's okay to make mistakes, that's how we learn."
    Mistakes are opportunities for growth, not shame.

  • Seeing behaviour as communication:
    Helping children feel seen and heard, and allowing them to naturally learn and understand the impact of their actions, without fear or shame.
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Parent in a Way That Feels Good to You and Your Kids

 

 

As a millennial mom, parenting with connection and patience can feel SO draining. 

WHY? 

Shame-Based Parenting was all the rage in the 90s...

 

  • Using shame and fear as the primary motivator for behaviour change ("Stop crying or I'll give you something to cry about" or "You should know better! Yoour sister would never have done that"). 
  • "Because I said so" parenting, where there was no space for honoring children's voices or opinions 
  • Big emotions were squashed, not accepted or understood, ("Stop crying! Quit acting like a baby!)

 

These impacted you.. at a deeper level than you probably realized, and pop up in your own parenting: 

  • why parenting with connection and intentionality feels so draining.. and you lay in bed at night wondering if you're doing enough
  • why you second guess yourself, unsure of what to say or do when your kid's meltdown at the park, get out of their beds 1000x at night, never listen when you ask them to do something or freak out in the middle of Costco. 
  • when  you hear yourself say something that sounds JUST like your own mom (and not in a good way), and know that shame is coming though your tone, voice and body language (it's in your energy)

 

 

Join the Shame-Free Parenting movement where we work on the "under-the-surface stuff", so parenting with connection and empathy feels natural and do-able.

 

Where you'll feel proud of your parenting, and your kids will feel it too. Where the peace in your home will increase (fighting will go WAY down), and you'll love the kids you have, and notice huge positive changes in your kids behaviour as you do. 

 

You're in the right place.

You're not alone.

This will work for you.

 

"It will take just one generation choosing gentle, compassionate, respectful parenting to change the world for all future generations... one little heart at a time."

- L.R. Knost
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Change Starts Within

What you really wanted as kid...

...to be seen. To be heard. To be valued. To feel loved. To feel supported. To feel known. To be welcome to be yourself- fully and completely. This is what we want to give to our kids. It's possible.

Are you ready to get started?

The Shame-Free Parenting Movement

 

  • Leave the scripts and how-to's behind and get to the root of parenting challenges: why we're triggered by our kid's behaviours and how to heal

  • Increase your parental intuition: lean into your own personal authority and create parenting solutions as unique as the child they're for

  • Ditch the outside opinions of what your parenting "should" be like, and parent in your unique way: living life in your own way, with confidence and ease

  • Understand how to utilize you and your partner's unique strengths in parenting, even when they are different (they usually are)

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Client Stories

 

Before Coaching… I knew I was a good mom, but I wasn’t doing all the things that I wanted to be doing in parenting. Things sometimes felt like a burden. I knew it was time to turn things around. I was reading all the (parenting) books everyone told me to read- and it didn’t feel like it fit for me.
 
Now… I do it differently now than a lot of the books say, but I feel way more connected to my kids. I trust myself instead of “the books”. I feel like I know what to do. I have more compassion for myself and for my children. I feel way more at peace when I go to bed every night. I feel more confident in my life in general.

Listen to her full journey on the podcast: CLICK HERE.
 

Maryann-
Listen to another client story - on the podcast
How 1 mom decreased meltdowns and increased connection

A little about me...

 

I'm a Certified Professional Life Coach, a mother of 4, a lifelong learner, leader, homeschooler, adventurer, and avid reader. I am committed to building connection in every area of my life... starting from within. 

For over a decade I have studied the works of professionals like Brené Brown, Sue Monk Kidd, Gordon Neufeld, Deborah MacNamara, and dozens of other experts who chose a route other than the norm. 

I have a degree in psychology, a certification through The Life Coach School, and am Dare to Lead certified (Brené Brown). I have helped dozens of women (and couples) through parenting challenges of all shapes and sizes... centered in connection, emotional work and intuition. 

You can parent calm, confident
children, that you love to be
around... at all ages.

...and chances are, if you love to be around them, they'll love to be around you too.

Join the Shame-Free Parenting Movement for Only $997

8 Group Coaching Calls. Even when you can't verbalize what's going on for you- you'll see it in others.. and just through watching coaching, you'll FEEL the changes in you.

It's much MORE effective and supportive than working through things on your own.

3 Group Subconcious Reprogramming Calls- we'll work on all the "below-the-surface" stuff that is a driving factor to change. Again, hearing and watching others go through these changes, will change you too. 

3 Dad Calls designed to help your partner through their parenting challenges- and give them a space to open up and connect with other dads doing this same work.

Join the Movement

How is this different from other programs? 

 

1) Don't join if you're looking for someone to tell you what to do (scripts, mantras, ways to connect etc.). This is NOT a teaching program, or just another parenting book... it's CHANGE on a deep level.

 

2) Most parenting support focuses on what we should DO (spend more time with our kids, say certain phrases to them, look them in the eyes while we talk etc.). These are what I call "bandaid solutions". We don't need others to tell us what to do, we can unblock our own answers, so it'll come more naturally to us.

 

3) When parenting in your own individual way, it's common to feel like others aren't on board (and maybe even judging your parenting a little bit). We'll work on getting clarity and confidence- so you can be YOU with gusto- not worrying about others. 

Crystal sitting cross legged on couch

Shame-Free Parenting

$997 USD

  • 8 group coaching calls (audio and video recordings available after the calls)
  • 3 subconscious reprogramming calls
  • 3 dad calls for your partners
  • Community support for questions and homework
Join the Movement

Payment Plan

3X of $333 USD

  • 8 group coaching calls (audio and video recordings available after the calls)
  • 3 subconscious reprogramming calls
  • 3 dad calls for your partners
  • Community support for questions and homework
Join the Movement
Have more questions? Let's chat on Voxer

FAQs:

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