S03|19 - Connection + Menstrual Cycle Tracking with Jade Alexander
Jan 03, 2022Jade is an Intuitive Life Coach & Menstrual Cycle Educator helping women understand their minds and menstrual cycles so they can create their version of having it all.
What we cover in this episode:
- What menstrual cycle tracking is and how it can help moms
- Connecting to ourselves through our cycles
- Harnessing the powers of rest and intuition
IG: @itsjadealexander
Podcast: Grow with the Flow
Cycle Tracking 101
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Episode Transcript
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Hey, I'm Crystal, a certified life coach and mom of four. In this podcast, we combine radical connection and positive parenting theories with the How-To Life Coaching Tools and Mindset Work to completely transform our relationship with our children.
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Hi, welcome to the podcast today, Connection + Menstrual Cycle Tracking with Jade Alexander.
Who Jade Alexander is, and what she does
Jade is an Intuitive Life Coach & Menstrual Cycle Educator who helps women understand their minds and menstrual cycles so they can create their version of having it all.
Hey, Jade, so happy to have you today.
Jade Alexander: Hey, thanks so much for having me on.
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Hey, I'm excited because Jade came as a guest expert in my membership a while ago, and it was awesome. And we've been connecting for a long time on Instagram, I don't even know how long. We haven't met in real life yet, but I'm sure it'll happen one day. But I would love for you to just say hi to everybody, and tell them a little bit about you.
Jade Alexander: Hey everybody, thanks for coming on and listening. So, my name is Jade Alexander, and I am an Intuitive Life Coach & a Menstrual Cycle Educator. So, I help women connect with their divine cyclical nature to create their unique version of having it all.
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Okay. What's 'having it all'? What do you mean, Jade? How can we have it all?
Jade Alexander: You know, I think that's up to every person. It's always so unique. Every person I talk to is a little bit different, and I'm finding that some of my clients have, you know, big business entrepreneurial ambitions.
Some have passions that they're chasing, and want to balance that with family. Some want more peace and more presence within their marriage and their parenting. So, I think for everyone it's a little bit different; and we work with your specific cycle, and we work with your specific life goals.
How Jade Alexander got started as a Menstrual Cycle Educator
Crystal The Parenting Coach: I love that. I love that you connected with cycles. So, when Jade came and talked to us about this in my program, it was the first time that I'd kind of really been thinking about this; I didn't know a lot about cyclones and cycle tracking.
I mean, I obviously have my own cycles, but I haven't been educated a lot about that. So, how did you get into this yourself? Like, tell us a little bit about your story.
Jade Alexander: Yeah, well, first, I guess, I just want to say that I think that's a very common thing that as women, you know, we have multiple children before we've discovered this world of cycle tracking – not for the purpose of getting pregnant or avoiding getting pregnant – there's this whole world of cycle tracking just because it helps us connect to ourselves.
I learned that about a year and a half ago, and I was already a life coach at that time; I already had a growing business, things were going pretty well. However, I started experiencing some really intense mood swings; they seemed to get worse after the birth of my second child.
And every month just seemed worse and worse, and I felt like I was going crazy. And as I was trying to grow a life coaching practice and have a thriving marriage and be the mom to my kids I wanted to be, and just juggle all these things, I felt like the biggest war I was fighting was against my own body.
My energy levels would just drop, and I'd feel depleted. My emotions were all over the place; and it wasn't fun to be with myself, and I don't think anyone in my family was enjoying being around me either.
And I was actually on a group coaching call and it was in the – what I call – The Void, which is the few days right before you start your period where you just have some really intense emotions. And I was getting coached, and I was feeling all these emotions come up.
And someone had just mentioned to me, 'Are you about to start your period?' And I was like, 'Actually, yeah, I am.' And they're like, 'Okay, well, that might be causing some of this turmoil that you're going through.'
But then, afterwards, they sent me a link to a TED Talk about Menstrual Cycles; and that just opened this door to a whole new world of learning about myself, my feminine body, my reproductive system, my hormones – and it's just really taken off from there.
How Jade Alexander's Menstrual Cycle knowledge transformed her life, as well as her business
Crystal The Parenting Coach: I love this. So, I'm just going to ask some more questions, how do you-- How did you see it not only transform your life, but also your business?
So, at that point when you were like, 'Okay, wait, there might be something more going on with this – and with these intense emotions and thoughts that I'm having,' how has your life changed since then and your business?
Jade Alexander: Oh, wow. That's like a simple question, but I feel like I am like a totally different person now. The first thing is just awareness; like as coaches, that's what we help people do – we help people become aware of what they're thinking and what it's creating for them.
And just building awareness around my emotional patterns, my behavior patterns, and realizing that; I go more outward during certain parts of my month, I'm more inward during certain parts of my month. My moods ebb and flow – my energy levels ebb and flow.
And just being able to observe that, and just stop judging it. I used to judge myself so much for having hormones. I didn't realize that was what I was judging, but judging myself for being a female and having hormones and having a reproductive system. And so, really just gaining awareness and dropping the judgment has changed my relationship with myself completely.
But really, what started as keeping a journal, checking boxes, taking notes – like a very logical approach to all of this – really turned into a very deep dive in self-exploration. I feel like it blew the doors wide open, and I was able to get to know myself in way more depth than I had before.
And that, I mean, once you start getting to know yourself – you start loving yourself and honoring all parts of you without judgment – that trickles into your marriage, your parenting. I even went through a big faith progression after cycle tracking for a while because I just started seeing myself and my purpose so differently.
And then that trickled into my business, and what my purpose was, and why I was helping women, and how much of myself I wanted to give to my business versus my family.
And so, maybe this is kind of going on a tangent, but it really has changed every area of my life, which sounds crazy that like tracking your cycle could do that, but that's what it's done for me and that's what it's doing for my clients too.
What menstrual cycle tracking is, and how it can help moms
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Hey, I love it. So, tell us more about cycling then. Like, what is this whole menstrual cycling? How do we-- How do we track it? I guess, what's the purpose of tracking it? What can we notice? Just tell us all the things.
Jade Alexander: Okay. So, we're going to do a quick science lesson; I'll try to not let it be too boring, but--
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Awesome.
Main natural female hormone shifts throughout the month
Jade Alexander: I think the most important thing that you guys need to know is that you go through four main hormone shifts throughout the month. And this is, if you're not on any kind of hormonal birth control – if you are just cycling naturally – this is what's happening for you.
1. Menstruation / inner winter
So, you would start tracking on Day 1 of your first full bleed, like of what we would call period, right? Menstruation. And so, menstruation is that first hormone phase.
2. Inner spring
And once you stop bleeding, you enter into the second phase, which--
I guess, I should backtrack; when you're bleeding, I call it inner winter, because it's very inward – you're kind of hibernating, resting.
And so, then you shift into the second phase, which I call inner spring; and this is when you start to wax in energy and in confidence, in creativity – you just start to come back out of your shell a little bit, and that's a transition point to ovulation.
3. Ovulation
So, ovulation would be the third hormone phase; that's what I call your inner summer. It's when you are like just vibing, living your best life in every way; you just feel good very outward expressive, connected.
4. Inner autumn
And then, you shift back into another transition which is phase four; and that is your inner autumn. So, that's when people experience PMS or the big mood swings or the void – like I mentioned, that would be inner autumn or inner fall; and then you bleed again, and you start the cycle over.
And this just has to do with an ebb and flow in different hormones that we have. They're moving all monthlong; and they create inward times, outward times. It affects our mood, our appetite, our energy levels, our natural motivation. Pretty much every part of us is affected by our hormones, if we are naturally cycling females.
Harnessing the powers of rest and intuition
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Wow. Wow. I love it. I love that it's the seasons, easier to remember. And how did this, like, because you've mentioned that cycle tracking transformed your life.
So, now we know about the cycles and we know about how it transformed your life, what does that look like? Like, what's the connection there, now that we know a little bit more about it? How can that help?
Jade Alexander: I was actually just talking to someone today about how I just rested today, I slept in. I mean, I dropped my son off at school; and I came back home, got in bed, and my youngest son and I just snuggled in bed.
I used to feel so guilty just lying in bed. I’d tell myself, "You have so much you need to get done, and this isn't productive." But now, I'm able to just let myself rest; and that has been a big lesson I've learned from tracking my cycle is sometimes our bodies just need rest.
Not because it's productive to rest, not because it's going to help us be productive in the future; sometimes we just want to rest, and that's okay. And honoring what my body is asking for without judgment, so that's just one example that I thought of.
Crystal The Parenting Coach: I love that example.
Jade Alexander: Yeah, being on your period really helps you to slow down. And I think we live in a world that is very against slowing down; we're very productivity and success and check-the-box driven. And when I started tracking my cycle and felt the need for my body to slow down, I started just honoring that.
Instead of pushing against it or resisting and feeling like I have too much to get done to rest, I just started listening. And I found that not only was I then able to not burn out, I was able to stay more, I guess, to live more sustainably without burning out.
Difference between male and female hormone regulation
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Okay. I love all the changes that you've been talking about. I think that a lot of times we don't tune into our body and what our body needs because we're like, 'Oh no, we shouldn't rest,' because our society is set up in not a female way. So, tell us a little bit about that, because I know that there's differences in hormones and the patterns between male and female. So, tell us a little bit about that.
Jade Alexander: Yeah, this is one of the most fascinating things that I learned; the difference between male and female hormone regulation. So, men actually regulate their hormones every 24 hours. They're very much like-- I think of them like the sun; how it comes up and it goes down, same time every day. And that's kind of the world we live in, like this nine to five, Monday to Friday pattern.
However, us women regulate our hormones every 28 to 35 days; that's the length of a typical cycle. And so, really, we have this chance to spread out a little – not to hustle, not to worry so much about getting things done – and there is a time and a menstrual season literally for everything that we need to do.
So, for us, our life can look a little different if we learn to work with our cycle instead of fighting against it and trying to live maybe in the more masculine hormone approach.
Yeah, that, I mean-- I don't know how in detail you want me to get – but, for example, inner winter… when you're bleeding, your intuition is really high. This is a good chance to go inward and connect with yourself and get clear on setting intentions for the rest of your cycle or the rest of your month.
You don't necessarily have to take action on anything; it's just getting clarity, just sticking to your intuition. And then, in spring, you have time to start making a plan and using your logic.
Your cognitive function is super high during this time, and so working out all the details from a very logical analytical place. And then you shift into summer, and this is your time when you have all the energy and focus and drive to put things into action, and actually birth things into the world.
I always say like, you're either making babies or you're making something else during inner summer. And so, putting things out into the world, there's always a time for that. And then, you have time to come back to evaluate; and that would be inner autumn to check in and see how that last cycle went, did you stick to that intention you set when you were on your period? What is serving you and what's not, and what can you let go of?
So, we just have this beautiful system of everything having its time and its season. And I feel like it just takes the rush and the hustle out of life, and it helps us to just be more present exactly where we are.
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Great, I love that because I do think our society is really structured in a lot more of a masculine way based on their energy cycles and all of that. So, I love just understanding this for ourselves as moms.
Even if you don't run a business or anything, I think that we can all take this and then use it, so we're like, 'Hey, in this cycle, this is what we can look for – in this cycle, this is what we can look for.'
And I talk a lot about tapping into our own parental intuition. Like, what can I do as a mom here for me, for my kids? And so, I love that you talked about what we can do in each of those cycles as well.
Connecting to ourselves through our cycles
Crystal The Parenting Coach: I'm curious, when you talked about your story, you talked about how you felt like so much more connected to you, what's the connection there between cycling and you connecting to you more?
Jade Alexander: Yeah, it was a very surprising result. I really didn't expect to develop a new relationship with myself. I thought I was just going to figure out my physical symptoms, and that would be all I needed.
But I would say, cycle tracking, at first – it seems like it's just checking boxes, taking notes. But really it became a daily practice of tuning into myself, of taking time for me, of prioritizing me – of listening to what was going on in my brain, what thoughts was I thinking and what emotions did I feel throughout the day? Where did I feel them in my body? What was my--
Even like my appetite, like just paying attention to the little details that sometimes I think as moms, we don't pay attention to because we're so busy thinking about everyone else and everyone else's needs – and just taking a few minutes every day to check in with me, was really what started the change.
It was like atomic habits; you know, a little bit every day makes a big difference over time.
Jade Alexander’s final tips on Connection & Menstrual Cycle Tracking
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Yeah. It's just that tiny little percentage that makes such a huge difference. So, if there's a mom that's listening to this episode and she's resonating with some of what you're saying, and she's like, 'Yeah, I feel like I struggle to connect with myself, and I think this might help,' what would be like a first step? Like, what's a tip – one or two, however many tips you want to give – that would help her?
Jade Alexander: Yeah. So, first, I guess, a tip would just be for her to have the awareness that she's normal, and she's not alone. I think sometimes when we are feeling the intensity of our hormones, we feel like we're the only ones who are feeling this – like, we are crazy; and that's just not the case. We all feel that, one extent or another.
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Yep.
Jade Alexander: But a more tangible tip, I guess, would be to start tracking your cycle; and that can be-- I mean, you can get as simple or as detailed as you want, but just taking even just one to two minutes a day and journaling out--
Even if you're not even going to connect it to your period, like journaling out what day it is; and just a quick check-in of how you're feeling physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually – that would be a fantastic foundation to start from.
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Thank you. Thank you. I love that. I already love that. After you came and talked in our program, I started tracking; and I've been doing it ever since then.
Jade Alexander: Yay!
Crystal The Parenting Coach: So, I'm glad. I did that little percent of 'things to change'.
How to connect with Jade Alexander
Crystal The Parenting Coach: So, thank you for your tips today; and if people are wanting to reach out and connect with you and learn more about this, where can they find you?
Jade Alexander: I would love for you guys to come over and chat with me over on my Instagram, it's @itsjadealexander. There you can find a free guide that I've created for you, which is Cycle Tracking 101; and that is what to track, how to track and why it all matters.
It gets a lot more detailed than I went here on the podcast; and it can help you just get started right now, connecting to yourself.
Crystal The Parenting Coach: I love it. I'm going to go download that. It sounds awesome.
Jade Alexander: Thank you.
Crystal The Parenting Coach: Thank you, Jade. Thank you for being on here, and sharing your wisdom with us.
Jade Alexander: Thanks so much for having me.
Crystal The Parenting Coach: I hope you enjoyed today's episode. Make sure that you give it Five Stars on Apple, and check out my monthly membership for moms in the show notes.