S10|03 - Moving Through Grief — A Somatic Experience

This fun episode is an interview with me! I get asked all the questions you might ask me too… what has your journey been like? How did you get where you are now? What do you do and how does it help people? You’ll hear me help my friend and fellow coach, Sarah Bond, process through grief in a different way than you’ve likely heard before. Let’s dig in! 

What we chat about today: 

• Why I don’t coach the same way that I used to, and what I found that has been more effective for me 
• Why emotions need to be processed in the body, and not in the mind
• We move through an inner child/somatic practice to help with grief… and it takes us in an expected, but beautiful direction. 
• Choosing from abundance, instead of lack, to find your next area of growth… “healing is remembering” 

Connect with me:

Intuitive Journaling Prompts HERE and another somatic meditation (Move through frustration in 15 minutes or less) HERE

Get started on this work through a daily mindset practice from Coach Crystal- Journal HERE

Work with Crystal 1:1: www.coachcrystal.ca/miracle or in group: www.coachcrystal.ca/creationroom

Grab your copy of Crystal’s feelings wheel here: www.coachcrystal.ca/wheel 

 

Summary

In this episode of the Parenting Coach Podcast, Crystal discusses the somatic experience of moving through grief with her guest, Sarah Bond. They explore how processing emotions physically and intuitively can aid in healing. Crystal guides Sarah through exercises to release trauma stored in the body, emphasizing the connection between emotional and physical healing. They also delve into inner child work and intuitive journaling as tools for transforming grief into strength and creativity. The episode highlights the importance of listening to one's body and intuition to navigate loss and find resilience.

Key Topics Discussed

• Introduction to Crystal's journey and the Parenting Coach Podcast

• Sarah Bond's grief journey and the need for somatic processing

• The role of intuition in healing and daily life

• Inner child work and its impact on emotional healing

• Intuitive journaling as a tool for self-discovery and healing

• Practical exercises for processing grief somatically

• The importance of feeling emotions in the body

• Transitioning from logical to intuitive living

• Crystal's coaching approach and offerings

• Final thoughts on healing and self-care

 

Full Transcript

This transcript has been created to provide a text-based version of the podcast episode for accessibility and convenience. While effort has been made to ensure its accuracy, it may contain errors or omissions. Please note that the exact words and intended meaning of the speaker(s) are best understood by listening to the original audio recording.

To experience the full conversation in its authentic form, please listen to the episode directly on your preferred podcast platform.

Introduction to the Episode

Crystal: [00:00:00] Welcome to the Parenting Coach Podcast with Crystal. Over seven years ago, I felt like I was stuck in this cycle of yelling and reactivity in my parenting that I did not want to be in, but I didn't know how to get out of. I knew how I wanted to parent pretty much exactly, and I'd spent hours reading books, but not finding a way to show up how I wanted to.

That's when I started to turn inwards. My own inward journey was what my family needed. As I changed, everything around me changed. My kids meltdowns decreased by 90 percent or more with no medications or therapy. I stopped yelling, sibling fighting became almost entirely non existent, and I found that this change flowed into other areas of my life too.

My intuition increased. I started to run my life and business in a very different way. If this sounds like something you want too, I can help. Join me each week as I share my journey, including the laughter, fun, hard times, and tears. Tune in for support, guidance, and fun conversations. With my favorite experts and really anything else that interests me too.

Sarah Bond's Grief Journey

Hello, everybody. Today is kind of a fun episode. So I had a [00:01:00] coaching friend that I connected with online. Her name is Sarah Bond, and she was asking about people potentially coming on her podcast and her YouTube channel that she was starting to kind of help her process through some grief that she has been dealing with since losing her partner last year.

And I stumbled across her post and I felt called to it and we connected and I was able to be over on her channel. And she said, you know, why don't you share it on your podcast as well. And I went through and was reviewing and listening to it. And I was like, this is such a good explanation of what it is that I do and where I've come from.

And also how we can process emotions somatically, how we can process experiences or trauma that's stuck in our body in a more intuitive way, really getting into the body. So we're going to, you're going to actually see me walk her through this. So we talk about it. We talk about what I do. And then she says, You know, can you help me with this?

And we talk a little bit about what she wants help with. And then I walk her through the exercises. So as you're going through this, you can listen just for information and kind of [00:02:00] figure it out and be like, Oh, this is interesting. But you also can go through it in your own experience as well. You can go through it like you would a meditation and process through something that's coming up for you, especially surrounding grief.

It's a really beautiful episode. Thank you so much for having me, Sarah. And you can go ahead and listen to our whole interview. Now it's a little bit longer than my typical episodes, but I hope that you will find it useful and powerful to you. And I would love to hear your takeaways

Sarah: Thank you for being here with me today. And I want to start out. I don't, I don't want to introduce you. I want to hear it in your own words. Who you are, what you do, who you help.

Crystal's Background and Journey

Crystal: Okay. Awesome. So that has changed a lot over the years. And, most people know me as the parenting coach. I have a parenting coach podcast, and I've been doing attachment based parenting connection based parenting for years.

My favorite part was helping kids, helping parents of kids with neurodiverse needs. I have some kids with high functioning, autism, and ADHD, and, parenting was a real struggle for me. And so, [00:03:00] Kind of beyond reading all of the books and learning all of the things about a detachment and connection.

I never really felt like I was able to do it effectively. until I did my own inner work surprise, surprise. That was like, that was the thing that was really blocking me. And as I started to do that and transform my parenting, I realized that my kid's behavior transformed like drastically. And so my kiddo that has the highest needs, is doing so well.

He's a teenager now, no medication, no individualized therapy for him, no special programming. Like he is, he is just doing so, so, so good. And, I saw those changes happen as soon as I started to do my own inner stuff. So that's kind of what happened pre becoming a life coach. and then I was actually looking for a master's program in therapy.

I always planned on being a therapist and I had my degree in psychology and I found the life coach school certified there. We've done a few certifications since, but one of my main focuses has been shame. 

The Role of Shame in Emotional Healing

So I did a training, called dare to lead through by Brene Brown. And I [00:04:00] started just noticing that shame was kind of the thing, the thing that was really blocking us from, from everything, whether it's parenting or relationships or business or whatever.

And as I started to, you know, we're, we're always our own first, best client. So I started doing this work on myself cause I was a highly. triggered, highly emotionally activated person. And I started working on that, working on my nervous system. And again, just kept seeing big changes happening with myself.

And, over the years have kind of transitioned where my favorite work is still shame free living, figuring out where shame is hiding and all of the corners of ourselves and not just noticing it and calling it out, but also, shifting it, noticing how it's connected to our childhood. And that kind of comes in to the attachment based parenting part is that.

Our own attachments and connections from childhood impact how we're being triggered now. So that's kind of the work that I do and, transitioning now to helping people run intuitive lives. because what I've noticed is when we do this shame free work is [00:05:00] that our intuition is a lot louder. We're able to hear it more.

We're able to truly like feel success, feel enough, feel good, feel worthy now. And then, we can create some really beautiful things. So I kind of talk about all the things, if you know, human design, I'm a manifesting generator. So I love to like talk about all the things all the time, but, That is where, where I am right now.

Sarah: Yeah. You know, and, and being, you know, when people ask me what kind of coaching I do, I kind of identify as a coach that helps people fall in love with themselves. And I did that work for myself. And I'm curious, since you mentioned shame, there’s something that I've noticed, and I'm curious if you've noticed this with yourself and with your clients is I feel like I don't experience shame anymore, like it's been a couple of years and I remember what that emotion felt like, like very distinctly and, you know, being able to  kind of like work through it and, [00:06:00] but it's literally, if sometimes I'll, something will happen in my life now and I wonder like, Why don't I feel bad about this? You know, like, and then I have to like, literally look for it.

What? Okay. I don't feel guilty or shame about this. Whereas I think I would have before. And then I have to like, really go in and try to find. The thoughts that I'm thinking that would cause that, but they don't automatically come anymore. Did you have that experience? 

Crystal: Yeah, I tell people often that like when you do shame work, you find yourself less frequently triggered and less strongly triggered.

So yes, absolutely. We're still triggered, but we might not show it in the same way. And it might, might not be as activated. Whereas before, I would be like, so there's three ways that we respond to shame. One is with criticism and blame. One is with, shutting down and withdrawing. And the other one is with people pleasing.

And so, I, I for sure have gotten rid of those things in huge ways, like in ways where it's like [00:07:00] really obvious and significant, occasionally they'll still pop up, but for the most part, it's a lot more subtle. So it might be things like resistance. in my business or resistance to digging in, in a relationship, or it might be like a really mild response, right?

Somebody sends me an email and I can kind of feel this little twinge, but I have to be so, aware of it because like you said, like, it's not, You know, before I would just like yell at my kids, like, by the way, yelling is shame. If you don't, if you don't know that connection, your inner child is being activated.

Something connected to childhood shame is under the surface there. So whenever you're feeling strong emotional activations, that's what it is. And so, yes, those strong ones have definitely milded down. and I also think I tend a little bit more towards the shutting down and withdrawing or kind of like the more calm.

Criticism. Like I might not overtly be critical of other people. So I have to really, like you said, kind of look for it. I have to do my own daily practice [00:08:00] of like moving through what's coming up for me. How might this tiny little thing. Yeah. Like really, really be something. And that's actually been really cool work to do is like, I know that it's still there somewhere.

I know that there's something happening. Like, what do I feel today? And let's dig into that. And I call that process intuitive journaling. I do that every morning for like, 20 to 30 minutes. I'm like digging into my mind. And, anyway, so I do think like it shifts a little bit and it changes a little bit.

And absolutely five years ago, I would have never thought that like, I would be here now being like, I don't ever yell. And not even, I don't ever yell. I don't want to, I don't feel like it doesn't come out. It's not in my reaction anymore. And I would have never thought that was possible years ago. And so I just imagine now, like whatever it is that I'm dealing with where I am now, like in another five years.

After doing this work even deeper, what will shift, but yeah, I love it.

Intuitive Living and Coaching

Sarah: That makes sense. Yeah. And now, now that you, that you word it that way, I'm like, yeah, okay, mine, it is just more [00:09:00] subtle. Okay. What was it that, you know, when I reached out to the coaching community and shared that, you know, I had lost my love and I was going through the grieving process.

What was it about, you know, and, and talking about how I was ready to, you know, like I didn't really need coaching and mindset work. It was more like learning how to lean into the somatic experience of it. What was it about me sharing what I was going through that made you say, I want to help.

Crystal: It's so interesting actually, because I don't usually say that.

I don't like, I'm not usually looking for extra things. I have lots going on. So I will say that one of the transitions over the last few years for me has been intuitive coaching, but also just intuitive living. And so my husband and I and our four kids were traveling the world and I even did like intuitive traveling because I was like, wait.

Planning is taking me 20 hours a week. I don't have time for this. So I was like, how can I bring intuition into this? And so it really is just listening to those little flickers of like ideas that [00:10:00] come or whatever. So I'm like scrolling through our page. And I was like, I actually think I even scrolled past it and then was like, Nope, that was, That was the thing like that was a nudge.

And so, that is the main reason. Cause I now always, always listen to my intuition. Cause I always know that my intuition guides me to something that I need. and I also think, what I have really transitioned to. So I, like I said, I certified with, the life coach school years ago, but I haven't coached in that way in probably four, three or four years.

What I noticed is that shame is in the body and emotions are in the body. Feelings are in the body. And that is the work that needs to be done in order to really shift our energy. Like that, that is the work. And I kind of created my own process as I was going through my own inner work. I was like, Hey, wait, how do I, how do I do this?

What do I do? And, as I did, I kind of, It was kind of a meditation visualization and I would go into my body and be like, Hey, where is this? And what, where is it [00:11:00] stuck and what is happening? And I feel like that work has been really different and really shifting for me, really shifting in my energy and, anyways, I love doing it.

And so that's what made me reach out to you. Cause I was like, I really think, I think it's a really different approach. I don't even know if it's really called coaching anymore. I don't know what it's called, but, I really love doing it. And some people might call it like inner child healing or something, but it's really just noticing, like, where is there stuck energy, stuck emotion that I'm holding in my body that I might not even have, conscious awareness of.

And it might be showing up in like mine shows up in tension in my jaw, or maybe I get like a headache or maybe I have pressure somewhere. And I just know that everything is interconnected physically and emotionally. And so I'm always looking. for that and trying to kind of process through that on my own.

Sarah: Okay. Nice. Okay. So, yeah, I mean, I'm, I'm just going to hand over to you. Like I'm [00:12:00] become the client and I want everybody to know, like today I gave myself permission. Normally I'm sitting at my, at my, coaching Desk with my background and today I was like, I just want to sit on my bed for the, like, you know, Rob's cat sitting next to me and it's comfy and it's squishy and I've got a pillow and I don't, I'm not going to worry about the background, you know, and I love that my rainbows have, I've got stickers.

I love it too. Those just popped up behind me because the sun keeps popping in and out and it's. It's perfect. And I just wanted to like honor that I gave myself permission. This doesn't have to be, this is messy. I want it to be messy and, and beautiful and those two things can, can go together. So just for, for people learning from this and watching like, yes, give yourself permission to do what feels intuitive.

And right. I think messy. And I think that's the only way. Messy [00:13:00] is the only way, right? Like when we're, when we try to do it perfectly, then we, when we, we block that energy, I think, especially inner child work, right? Like what kid is not just like messy and like trying and failing and like, I don't know, it's just, I love inner child work too, in that it's, It's not just like bringing up things that maybe be like hurting us in the moment, like painful for us in the moment, but it also opens us up to play, to rest, to excitement, to joy, to creativity.

There's a lot of beautiful things that we had as a child. And I think this work really is remembering. I think healing is remembering that we have always been whole, that we never were broken, right? When we were four, we knew we were awesome. I know my, my toddler, who's not a toddler anymore would tell me this regularly.

I would tell him like, Oh, your Duchess did such a good job. He's like, I know I'm awesome. And he, you could tell that by the way, he [00:14:00] said it. He believed it and he was so just like, he was a person who believed that he was loved, believed that he had love, believed that he could do anything, that anything was possible.

And the more that I was able to coach in this space and also see my children grow, I was like, they already have this, like the little ones already have this. And so healing is remembering the beliefs that we always held about ourselves in the beginning that we have forgotten.

Sarah: Okay. I'm so curious now to see.

Crystal: Okay. So usually I ask kind of like what's coming up or if there's something coming up. So if there is something present for you, bring that up. And if not, we'll, we'll dig into something. 

Sarah: I mean, if, you know, if I just sit here and I, and I go inward and I think like, you know, and I asked [00:15:00] myself, how are you doing today, babe? You know, there's immediately, you know, the sadness comes up the remembering that. You know, I lost my person and, you know, there's other changes going on that I don't get to, you know, talk to him about in physical form, you know, I talked to him, but, you know, I don't get to talk and see his face and hear his voice.

And yeah, it's just. It makes me sad. There's a lot of, like, loneliness in this, this journey right now, you know, because not, not that, not that I don't have support, like, obviously, like, I have you guys, I have friends and family, but nobody replaces that person, you know, so there's like an extreme void of that special connection that is just very, very It's extra present today with, you know, the [00:16:00] last day of coaching for the life coach school and, you know, other things that have happened in my life recently that I wish I could share with him. And yeah, so immediately I can just sense the heaviness and the sadness.

Somatic Processing of Grief

Crystal: Yeah. So that's what we're going to dig into because this work isn't so much logical. One of the things I recognized was when it comes to these kind of beliefs under the surface or these emotions under the surface, we can't just like logic our way through it.

We can't be like, okay, well like talk consciously, right. Coach consciously in a way where I feel differently after I really think it's in the body. 

Guided Somatic Exercise

So what we're going to do is we're going to close our eyes. We'll start with our breath, we'll get into the body and then we'll see what happens from there. So you can just get into any position that feels comfortable.

And as we close our eyes, we're just going to start with noticing our breath, [00:17:00] noticing how it feels to breathe in through the nose. Maybe the air feels a little bit cool. Maybe you can feel some of that air on your upper lip between your nose and your lip.

Maybe you can even feel it in the tiny little hairs in your nose going up and swirling and kind of coming down into your lungs. Maybe you can feel how on that exhale, that air warms. It leaves through the mouth, feeling warmed. Maybe you notice some sounds. Maybe there's sounds that are close or far away, loud or soft. 

Maybe there's even [00:18:00] smells that you can notice as you tap into your body. You might notice that there's pressure. Or tension somewhere, pain or discomfort. Maybe there's also spaces that feel kind of relaxed or open. We're going to drop even deeper into the body now that we're more mindful and more aware, and we're going to drop deeper into that feeling.

That feeling that you feel right now, that void, loneliness, sadness, and I invite you to go into the body, into where it feels more present for you and your physical body, maybe your head or your chest or your stomach. And for a moment, we're just going to sit there. With that feeling,[00:19:00] just noticing even little details about it, heaviness or lightness, fast or slow. As you sit with a feeling, I invite you to drop deeper and deeper into the body, deeper into the feeling, opening yourself up to receiving as much feeling as wants to come in.

Inner Child Work

I invite you to imagine that this feeling is a child. Within you. It's a little child feeling this way. They're feeling sad, feeling lonely, feeling this void, maybe this yearning to share about things happening in their life.[00:20:00]

And I want you to imagine the age of this child, not logically, but a number. We'll come even just a general age, and I want you to imagine that child of that age within you, what they might look like, we're putting all of what we're feeling inside of them. They're feeling so much of it. See if you can push all the feelings that you have within you into this little person inside. And we're going to take some time to listen to them. And if you feel comfortable, you can say this out loud. And if you feel more uninhibited, say it in your mind.

What we're going to be doing is we're going to be listening to the [00:21:00] message that this child has to give us. And we want to listen to the words they have to say in the energy. That they would say it in exactly as loud or as soft or as energetic or quiet as they feel it. We're going to listen to everything they have to say.

So you can go ahead and do that out loud or in your mind.

Sarah: I can't hear her saying anything about being sad. I just hear her saying like, it's okay. We're okay.

Crystal: Okay. Just let her say whatever she wants. We'll just listen. Just imagine yourself kind of sitting alongside her beside her on the bench. She's beside you and she just wants to share whatever she wants to share with you. Maybe you tell her that it's okay to be sad, maybe she tells you that it’s ok.

Sarah: She's definitely telling me.[00:22:00]

Crystal:We're gonna sit there and listen to all the words she has to say until she's said everything that she needs to, until she feels complete. 

Sarah: She just keeps repeating, I mean, she wants to, she's comforting me, which is so interesting. I thought it would be the other way around, but she is so sweet. And she's so innocent.

And she, it's like, she understands that she, even though she's alone, like, and I was alone a lot as a kid, she's okay. She, it's like she might be physically alone, but she's not alone and I'm remembering that now, even as a kid, like I just knew, even though I spent a lot of time alone, I wasn't alone. I don't know why necessarily I had that.[00:23:00]

Crystal:You had that knowing when you were little, because we're never truly alone within us. Your inner child has you and you have her always in a way that nobody else can understand or feel. As much as you can, we're going to sit there and we're going to imagine the two of us on that bench together, and we're going to ask her what she needs.

Maybe she asks us what we need and we're going to imagine ourselves giving each other that.

Sarah: It's funny because it's not like even that we need anything from each other other than just to sit in each other's presence. Words don't even need to be said. It's just like, [00:24:00] I'm here. 

Crystal: I often find it's not words. It's just energy. Just sitting in the energy of being there, sometimes a hug or a back rub or stroking her hair, rocking her, let me know whenever it feels complete, a presence and energy or giving each other.

Sarah: Yeah. We're now just looking at each other and smiling and we just see so much beauty in each other. I'm like, you're so beautiful. And she's like, no, you're so beautiful.

Crystal: It's a beautiful space to remember that we are always there for each other…hat she has you, that you have her, that you can come and commune with her anytime you want.

Sarah: I'm surprised how much wisdom she has, you know, like I thought I was [00:25:00] comforting her and it was the opposite. It's interesting. 

Crystal: It's pretty interesting to see how much our inner child can give us.

As we sit here, I want you just to notice the energetic shift, the feeling that she feels that you feel within you now, and how it feels different than it did before. And that feeling, those feelings that we have are messages. Almost all of the feeling messages we get are from our body to our brain, not the other way around.

So we're taking time to listen to the feeling message. I want you to imagine the feeling that you have right now. If it had a message for [00:26:00] you, what it would say, and we're just going to pause in stillness while we listen. It might be in an image or a word might be again, just energy. It might not even be a phrase.

Sarah: Yeah, no, it's, it's calm and it's warm and I'm, and it's golden. It's like, it's like honey coating the, the kind of before, you know, like this feeling like a a gut punch, you know, like a tightness in my gut and a tightness in my throat. And it just feels like it's just coated with warm honey, which is so funny.

Crystal: It's always wild to me and the images that come to my mind. Let's sit here for a moment longer. Let's extend this feeling of warm honey. coding everything. And as you sit in it, you [00:27:00] can even expand it. You can expand it all the way up to the top of your head or down to your toes can even flow through your fingers and your toes to the ground, connecting you to the earth, to the roots, to the interconnection that you have with all those around you and just bask in that warm golden honey light.

Reflection on the Exercise

And as you sit in this light, ideas or images or feelings might come to mind, answers, and they might come later as we are open to receiving more of this feeling.

Sarah: So I always feel so… Something I've noticed in this work is I always feel like very calm and relaxed and almost like [00:28:00] lethargic, not in a bad way.

Crystal: We're going to end this practice by taking our pointer finger and our thumb and we're just going to gently press them together to have a little physical connection from what we're feeling just to remind ourselves of it. And then we'll release it. And we're going to take three slow, deep breaths. And the breaths will take in through the nose, holding it for just a moment at the top, and then exhaling twice as long out through the mouth.

And then just go at your own pace with those breaths. This is a way to center into this feeling, expand it, feel it even more deeply. And then when you're ready, we're going to shake the body, shaking everything. And you can gently open your eyes. I think the work, the life philosophy, I believe [00:29:00] now is that we're in this house with two rooms, they're connected.

Transitioning Between Emotional States

And the one room is the sad and the loneliness, the grief, pain, discomfort, shame, any of that. We need that as a beautiful gift for us in those rooms, so much learning in that room. But when we're in that room, often There only feels to be like two answers and it's usually control or apathy in some way, like giving up or like going all in and making it happen.

Right. And when we shift our energy, which is the only purpose of being in that room is just to sit and listen and be with the feeling as long as we need to. We open up the door to this other room and in the other room is this feeling of like trust centeredness. It's calm, but it's also grounding. It's knowing, like you said at the beginning of this call, like everything always works out.

That is the message from that other room. And in that other room, there's infinite possibilities. [00:30:00] Doesn't matter if it's in your business, your relationship, or your life. There's all these intuitive ideas, creative solutions that come. And I think it's communing with our inner child that helps us flow.

back and forth. It's just having this relationship with them where we open up, we listen, we feel, and then we get to live in both of those spaces, knowing that each room has a gift for us. We're not supposed to always be in the trusting, contented space room because there's learning and growth from, from both.

and then I just take the time every day to do a practice, something like this, either through journaling or through in my body and shifting Into that other energy, especially listening to the message and for an often for me, the message isn't words often. It is just a feeling.

Sarah: Yeah. And, and can sometimes, is it just images [00:31:00] or images or yeah.

Crystal: it's whatever is needed. It's so interesting that it's yeah. And be so different. Yeah.

Sarah: Yeah, it's been fascinating to me, like just the imagery that my brain comes up with sometimes when I go in, I'm like, Oh, I couldn't, you know, I couldn't have made that up. I couldn't have even dreamt that to be something that I would envision and that would have a message for me.

Like, I never thought again that she would be the one with a message for me. You think of inner child work and you think I'm going to go back and heal her. I'm going to go back and help her. Wow.

Crystal: Because I think intuition is like that wisdom that's within us is like the wisdom of our inner child, right?

Like I was mentioning. We always we already had those beliefs within us. Like our child all our work now is to become like our kids to [00:32:00] become uninhibited to Just be so full of life as possible, right? You ask a kid what they're going to be when they grow up and they're just as excited to be like an ice cream scooper as they are to be an astronaut and everything is possible and they believe that they can be and they can because they believe it.

But over the years, we take on beliefs of others, right? Adults tell you don't be so much. Don't feel so much. Don't yell so much. Don't be as passionate as you are, right? We go to school and we're, you know, given A's and check marks and X's. And we make that mean something about ourselves. And we take on these layers of belief.

And I think our work is to take off those layers and just become who we always were this uninhibited, right? My daughter just twirls around and dances and makes up songs that don't make any sense. And I just sit in awe of that. Yeah. I'm like, that is what. That is our goal. That is my goal is to become that, like, I [00:33:00] don't care who else is around me.

I just get to be me. And I think the more me that I am, the more I help other people energetically be themselves. And I think the world needs more people being who they really are.

Sarah: I love that. I remember there was this kind of viral video going around of this, this older woman, probably in her seventies and this long flowy dress dancing in the waves on a beach.

And I remember seeing this video and being like, Oh, I want to do that. You know, it is the same thing you see in your, in your child, just having that, just without that inhibition that I can remember having, you know, as like a four or five year old. You know, before, yeah, before you feel like you have to start hiding or that's not okay, what are people going to think, you know, before all that stuff comes in and I remember going on, a [00:34:00] guided kind of psychedelic journey where I got to meet, you know, that the particular journey took me to.

Meeting versions of myself, you know, from younger years. And I remember sitting with that five year old and the things that she wasn't afraid to do that. I'm afraid to do now. And just being like, how, like, how do I tap back into that? So then talking with you today, it's like, Oh my gosh, yes. She's got some wisdom to teach me there,

Crystal: Right? How do I tap back into it? Like, she's just, she's just waiting.

Sarah: Yeah, yeah, that's just, I just remembered that about that particular journey of meeting up with her at that time. So cool.

Crystal: Yeah. And this is, I think even like when you think of business, right. When you think of. Creating a business or creating a goal, like any goal or intention that you have, it has to come [00:35:00] from that space too.

Like so often we're given goals externally. Like, this is what you should be doing. This is how you should be doing your business or your life or your relationship or your whatever. And I think that when we tap into our inner child, like there's just, you know, These wild ideas and like everything feels possible and then it becomes possible like that.

That's where I really believe is like the seedbed of manifestation too, right? If I believe that it's possible in this really non attached way, then I think that is how we call in whatever we want. It doesn't matter what area of our life it's in health wealth relationships. and I've seen that I've seen that come into fruition.

Sarah: yeah. Amazing. And I, and I remember having that, that first seed of this idea, this idea of like under, Oh, I wonder, you know, I wonder if I could do, Oh, do it this way. And then here, now, here we are like, here we are. And I've got, you know, another 40 people lined up that want to like [00:36:00] help and go through this journey.

And I'm just like, Oh my gosh, it's happening. We're doing it. And it's so exciting. I can remember even, after I had the idea and I was like, yes, let's do it. You know, the voice of like, I don't know, that sounds kind of crazy. That might, people might think that's stupid. You know, you really want to put yourself out there like that.

Crystal: You know, I was going to say shame pops in. Whenever we go to our next level of growth, right? We're like, Hey, I actually feel pretty good now. Right. I did that in my parenting. And then I'm like, no, I'm going to start a business. There's no way to, there's no better way to like, feel more shame than to like do something that you've literally never done before and have never, no, no past practice in. For your shame voices to come up and be like, who are you to that was…

Sarah: My shame voice. Yeah. And okay. So it did pop up, but it was so easy to recognize that, you know, I think because of the work I've done, it was so easy to recognize and just be like, Oh yeah. I remember these voices when I first [00:37:00] started doing the fall in love with yourself work.

And of course my brain was like, this is stupid. What are you doing? It's not going to work. And I was like, Oh, there's that same voice.

Crystal: Yeah.

Sarah: And I was like, Ooh, that means there's something really cool on the other side of this.

Crystal: Yeah.

Sarah: Yeah. Always. Yeah. Once I realized that it was like, okay, we're good. Let's go.

Crystal: Yeah. And it'll keep coming up. And it's always just remembering that like, Oh, this, this is that part. This is that part where that other energy comes in. And I just get to sit with myself and move through it. And, because intuition always takes us to where we need to go, or it always gives us. Yeah. What we desire.

So for manifesting something specific, it will give you that, or it will take you to the lesson that you need for you and your growth. So, anyways, it's a beautiful journey. And now I'm like all for the discomfort. I'm like, let's just bring on more times where my brain tells me that because I know what's on the other side of it.

Intuitive Journaling

Sarah: Do you, for people that are interested in the journaling aspect, do you have a particular kind of like prompt? If you say that you journal [00:38:00] every day, is there. How do you, how would you…

Crystal: so every month I, I tend to give out intuitive journaling while I give them out intuitive journaling prompts in my group program.

And they're usually based around some sort of theme. but you don't have to have prompts. You can do it yourself. And a few ideas to start. I do have some intuitive journaling prompts, as well that I can, give everybody for free, but there's a couple of the ideas are just like, where's the resistance in my life, especially if you've done this work for a while and things are going pretty good, where are you resisting?

In any area of your life, where are you not being fully yourself? Where are you not fully present? Where in your life feels a little bit off, not like not complete in alignment or not complete integrity can be something super small. Like the amount of time that I spend on social media, the amount of time I spent on my phone, it can be a little tiny relationship thing.

Like Where did I feel a twinge of something today? And the goal with intuitive journaling is always deeper, not wider. We don't want to get just like a million [00:39:00] thoughts out. Like we're going to write them down, but then we're going to ask ourselves again, like, okay, why what's underneath this? Where, where could this be connected to my childhood?

When have I felt this way before? What is the, what is the lesson in this for me? Where is the learning in this? And I'm just going to keep asking myself layers of questions like why what's underneath this? What is here for me? What is the gift here for me? And as I get deeper and deeper and deeper, eventually you'll get to this like really emotional hit.

Like you get to one where you just feel like, yep. Like that's it. You feel the energetic shift. And, so now I do this practice every day. It can even be some of the prompts that I do are just, I'm going to commune with my inner child today. What does my inner child have to say to me? What am I going to say to her?

And we're just going to go back and forth and have a conversation like writing it down or speaking it out or in my mind. so there's lots of ways you can do it, but I think my goal with intuitive journaling is always depth. I'm going to be writing a book on it this year. So that'll come out sometime [00:40:00] in 2025.

But I think the goal is to just get deeper and deeper into like, what's really down here. What's really in my soul today.

Sarah: And it sounds like, you know, as you, as you describe it, I'm like, yeah, I can see how, if you put that into practice, you know, it's like, it's like anything you've got to practice it, you've got to do it.

And then it starts to become more and more intuitive and more and more habitual. And like, it's just part of who you are now.

Crystal: Yeah. And it really has been, I feel just as much shift as when I started meditating. I started, I learned meditation a few years ago and I remember feeling like I feel really different on the days that I meditate versus the days that I don't.

And I decided to give myself this practice of like for seven days, I'm going to do this intuitive journaling thing. And I did it. And then I was like, I already felt a shift. So I'm like, I'm going to do it for 30 days. And by the end of the 30 days, I energetically felt so open. So in that infinite possibility room, that in a [00:41:00] way that I hadn't been in before that I was able to stay in so much more, especially as entrepreneurs, you, you know, if you're listening to this, you know, this, but especially during a launch, right.

When you launch something and then you get to that point where you're like, Oh, this isn't going to work or I'm frustrated or why is this happening or whatever. Right. that I, that part never came that part of the like up and down of the roller coaster. It didn't come to the down part of the roller coaster because every day I was like, wait, what's in here?

Like what's happening? Like where, what is here for me? And, it's been able to keep me in this more infinite possibility, energy space. within my business, but also in my life in a way that I hadn't felt before, at least so expansively. So anyways, and it's led me to all sorts of cool readings on Buddhism and, non attachment.

And I mean, I could do another like seven sessions talking about all the, all the less lessons that I've learned over the last few months of doing this practice, but, it just let it be intuitive. Let it be messy. Let it [00:42:00] be whatever it needs to be. Yeah.

Sarah: Do it. I think it's really important. I tell people that all the time.

It's like, I know that it's not comfortable sometimes stepping into a certain, you know, work, but like you said, like, if you just give it 30 days. And you do, you commit to it and, and, and, and really dive into it for that amount of time. Yeah. You're going to be amazed at the, at the change and you can't go, it's like, you can't go back.

You know, I felt that same energetic shift when I did the, you know, falling in love with myself work. I'm like, Oh my gosh, I had no idea I was going to feel this way and I could never go back. Yeah. It's so good. And now you have rainbows on your wall. It's like this perfect. Yeah. Yeah. Love it. Perfect. I love it.

can you tell people, please, like, if, are you open for business? Are you taking clients? If somebody is C and it's like, I love her, I need to work with her. How can they do that?

Crystal's Coaching Offerings

Crystal: Yeah. So this year I'm doing something totally different. I usually only work with people for three months and then I honestly don't ever re sign them because we've just like done [00:43:00] our parenting work and everything's great.

And, I, I feel complete and they feel complete anyway. So this year I'm doing it different where I'm going to be coaching for the whole year. And so that'll be one on one coaching. We'll meet three times a month. And then we'll also be using Voxer, which is a walkie talkie app, specifically to feel success.

Now, like this feeling that we're feeling inside, right? That golden honey feeling is the feeling that I had when I was a child. And that's what we want to get back to. We want to feel that in our relationships, in our wealth, in our goals, in our business, in all areas of our life. So. I'm doing that one on work one on one work with just a few clients.

I only have four more openings for that. And then I have a group program where I do the same work with women. So we have guided journaling prompts and we have guided meditations every month. We have an intention of the month. and we have one call every month and that is, that's a really cool program.

And I'm hoping to open up one day a month, just like one off sessions for people that just want to book and talk about whatever they want to. So I'll [00:44:00] probably be doing that at the end. Of January and I plan on doing that one day every month as well. So, all of those things are kind of like new shifts that I'm doing in my business, but I still want to keep up helping people with parenting and, you know, whatever else they want to talk about.

So, those sessions will be for that.

Sarah: Okay. And so do you, I mean, I'm gonna, I'm going to have it all on the show notes and everything. Yeah. What is how, what is the easiest way for people to find you?

Crystal: Yeah. Always Instagram and my podcast. My podcast is the parenting coach podcast with crystal. I'm going into season 10 right now.

It is awesome. I have like the most amazing. Guest interviews next. Like I can't even, I'm so excited for my first, my first guest speaker, but, that's a really cool place to find me that. And my Instagram, the dot parenting dot coach, is where you can find me. And I, I'm there, I'm there often sharing, posting, writing poetry.

Sometimes poetry comes out after I've done this energetic work that I'm like, I just start writing and all of all of these words flow. So that's another beautiful aspect to this work is [00:45:00] that once you shift that energy, like ideas come music. songs, creation, painting. I don't know. Just everything is on the other side of that.

So, yeah, so that's where you can find me. Come hang out with me on Instagram. Send me a message and tell me you saw this and ask me any questions you have. I can give you some cool exercises to get started.

Sarah: Wonderful. Any parting words like for when people are done with a session, like what do you, how do you tell people to like when they hang up to go about their, their day?

Final Thoughts on Healing and Self-Care

Crystal: I would say first to remember like this work is working. It's subconscious work. So what we did right now, we'll keep working. There's nothing you need to do to make it work. It is already working. and then just tend to yourself like you would your inner child, like tend to you like you would somebody that you love.

which I know you're already so good at. So just caring for yourself in that way. and taking time to listen to yourself. And I would, I usually say some sort of a [00:46:00] message that kind of comes up intuitively, but I'm going to say this, that, that remembering that healing is remembering healing doesn't come because it's like broken and we're fixing it.

Like we're not broken. We are whole. We are enough. We do enough. We have enough. We're more than enough. And the more that when we remember that, the more we live into that belief. And everything changes when we live from that belief. So that would be my parting message would just be to remember that healing is remembering and put yourself in situations and coaching with Sarah in reading books and podcasts that remind you of that.

Not help you forget, right? There's so many courses that will be like preying on that, like not enough ness, like take this because there's something wrong with you or because you don't have the answer because you need more. you don't choose from abundance, choose from a wholeness. You already have it inside you and just put yourself in situations to remind yourself of it [00:47:00] every day, to have the closest people in your life, be ones that remind you of that feeling.

Sarah: So good. I hope that really resonated with a lot of people. I know they needed to hear that. So, thank you. Thank you. Thank you so much for following your intuition and saying yes to coming on here with me. It has been an honor.

Conclusion and Call to Action

Crystal: You're welcome. Thanks for having me. If you enjoyed this episode as much as I did, I would love for you to help spread the word by getting this message of support and guidance out to as many people as possible.

So text it to your best friend or tag me on Instagram and share it, leave a review, rate it, subscribe it, or follow on your favorite platform. Send me a DM on IG letting me know which parts have impacted you or what you'd like to see on future episodes. We'll see you next week.