How to shift your story (and your life) 180 degrees in the first few moments of the day

Did you read last week’s post about story? You won’t want to miss it, it’s a game-changer. 

Now that we know our brain is going to feed us stories, mixed with a heaping dose of negativity and a sprinkle of gaps and bias— and that the combination of all of those can feel pretty crummy—

How do we shift our story? 

1)    Write out your story 

Buy a journal. Use a notebook or a scrap piece of paper, whatever! But WRITE every morning. 

Write out your story. 

Maybe it’s your story about how parenting is so hard, and you're failing at it. Maybe it’s the story about how your husband is never on the same page about parenting, and you’ll forever be in a power struggle about it. Maybe it’s a story about your teen or toddler and how you don’t know how to handle their behaviours. 

Likely a lot of these stories will be negative. That’s okay. Let it all out. Don’t judge or question yourself as you write… just release it all onto the paper (feel free to burn it or toss it out later). 

Once you feel like you’ve gotten it ALL out, you're ready to…

2)    Start questioning! 

Go back through your story and read it. As you read, start to notice patterns and thoughts. Start to question your story:

Is this the only story I could have here? 

What would my husband’s story be about this? 

Would my best friend agree with my version of the story? 

Does this story help my connection with my teen or toddler?

 Is this story verifiably true? Can my mind see any potential evidence of it NOT being true? 

3)    Notice how they feel

Take a few deep breaths, put the paper away and move on with your day. Throughout your day, you may think of these stories and then your mind can start to wonder how your stories feel- how questioning them feels. You will start to see other ways of viewing the same story. Notice how those shifted stories feel. 

Shifts will happen. Keep writing out your stories. Keep questioning. Keep feeling. 

You have the power over your story.  Own it! Harness that power. Remember:

 “When we deny the story, it defines us.

When we own the story, we can wrote a brave new ending.”

 Brene Brown 

Us, before them.... Crystal <3